The Friday Night Rave

Confront your wildest fears...

Ok, let's talk film. Welcome to the rave. It's gonna be a long movie watching weekend. I highly recommend The Nightmare Before Christmas on Blu Ray if you have means to a Blu Ray. I have my PlayStation 3 that I acquired earlier this year. It works perfectly for Blu Ray viewings. It looks amazing. I think it is a fantastic film that is so original especially compared with standard holiday fare. I mean you could watch Santa Clause or Saving Christmas, but why bother? When the holidays are here I will share with you the Holiday Films I suggest you watch again or maybe for the first time. But who am I? I am but one singular voice in this crazy overpopulated movie blog world.

There are thousands of movie bloggers out there. How do I separate myself from the rest? I am glad you asked. I do my best to enable you to think for yourself. I share with you what makes a film hot or not. I don't do lists and don't do reviews. If you read this blog daily, you will know what is worth seeing and what is not. Not by what TOP ten whatever I tell you, but with what I share with you about the industry itself. I, unlike execs, think you, the audience is very smart.

There were a lot of things that happened this week that I didn't talk about. A lot of my predictions came true. I predicted that all that stuff about Cher and Brain Austin Green was just campaigning., and it was. I talked two weeks ago about the Fox/Warner lawsuit being childish and annoying and LA Times published something to that effect. How do I know all this? Well these execs are easy to predict. And the actors who are diva-like are easy to predict. People with no talent have to pursuit every available avenue besides creativity to stay alive in Hollywood. Hollywood will always be a haven for the talented only. Talent and creativity is the only thing that sells in Hollywood.

We learned this week that ego and films that are not good, don't sell. I say it all the time and I am sure my smart filmfans think it all the time.

Well summer is over now. This weekend marks the end of the summer film season. I thought it was an amazing summer. Numbers wise it was the best summer on record. Now we get to look forward to all the DVD releases of the summer films. That is always exciting. I guess I am dried out now that it is Friday and the summer is over. So, I leave now to remind you that in spite of all my ranting and RAVEing about execs and Hollywood, I have to shout out that I am in love with MOVIES. I always have been. Movies are the greatest thing in the world as far as I am concerned. I watch movies all the damn time.

Movies make me happy, sad, pensive and motivated. That's why I write this blog. I love love love movies. I would not do it otherwise. I know A LOT about them and I don't force my opinions about them specifically down any one's throat. I hope you love movies like I do. Have a great weekend! Kiss the summer goodbye. Let's get ready for Oscar season! I am more than sure we will have soooooooo much to talk about then. Until Tuesday! Let's talk film!

The Changing Tide in Hollywood

Hollywood once made great film on purpose...

Ok, let's talk film. This is an easy subject for me. I am not sure if you know or not, but I actually do a lot of research in writing this blog everyday. It takes maybe about two hours at the most. Mostly an hour for me. Usually it's a subject I have to mull over for a bit. But this subject is easy for me because I talk about it ALL THE TIME. It's is the underlying subject in every blog I write, the quality of film. Hollywood has been getting away for a long time with delivering sub-par film. Yet, history repeats itself and it has again.

You see in the early 70's films used to run in the theater for up to a year. The only form of advertising was word of mouth. So in the 70's Hollywood knew they had to make quality film to perpetuate word of mouth. They went to USC and other film schools to recruit filmmakers to help make great film. Well this is total irony for the filmmakers they got were Coppola, Spielberg, Lucas, De Palma, Scorsese and Kubrick. The ones who made film not only great, but exceptional.

When Jaws was released in 1977, the world of film changed. It was the first film with a huge opening weekend. The studio heads since that day in 1977 have tried and succeeded until 2008 to fool audiences by heavy advertising. And all through the 80's and 90's, we ran to the theater to see Total Recall, Big Trouble in Little China, Matrix Reloaded and even Episode one, just to be let down.

It got really bad for a while

Well this summer has changed everything. Thank God for that. Studios know that they now have to produce quality film or any hope of breaking even at the Box Office is over. The films that reigned this year all were films of good review. A while ago, execs blamed texting for a film's opening failure. They did! Execs blamed texting. People texting each other after the film on opening day telling their friends the film sucked. Today its the Internet. Specifically Rottentomatoes.com.

The tomatometer at RT.com has wreaked havoc on studios marketing campaigns. We as an audience have once again regained control over the quality of film. We have all the studios scared. LA Times covers the studio by studio summer progress here. I know I feel like I am repeating LA times today, but I really wanted to chant from the rooftops today that Hollywood is fearful because they are realizing that the audience out here is smart.

And that is what Hollywood hates about us. They hate that we are smart. They want us to be dumb and listen to them. They want us to watch what they want us to watch. Well No more! When Disaster Movie bombs this weekend, the audience will have spoken completely. That's all Hollywood wants to do. They want to hire cheap, make cheap, dazzle, slap on a happy ending and count their money. I think that trend is ending. Hollywood needs to start making great film again. If they don't then we just won't go. Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Losing Battle of Hollywood Greed

Greed is not...you know

Ok, let's talk film. The Warner/Fox Watchmen feud will continue till the wee hours of next year for sure. The New York Times in trying to make sense of this issue. Here is the article that tells the fine print I didn't know about called the turnaround clause. Well the turnaround clause in any studio development contract says:

On its face, turnaround is a contractual mechanism that allows a studio to release its interest in a dormant film project, while recovering costs, plus interest, from any rival that eventually adopts the project. But turnaround is a stacked deck.

The turnaround clauses in a typical contract are also insurance for studio executives who do not want to be humiliated by a competitor who makes a hit out of their castoffs.

I talked about this a couple weeks ago. We knew Warner knew it was time to reap what Fox sat on for 16 years. But in the quote is the real reason besides making money they would not have otherwise made if they did it themselves. It's all about the EGO. EGO is rampant in Hollywood. I talk about this all the time. Projects are made and destroyed by ego.

An ego project

Well these two studios are in the sandbox and Fox had the idea for the sandcastle and Warner built it. I feel like I am repeating myself cause I covered this two weeks ago, but the point I wanted to bring up is that no one is going to win in this situation. Fox will destroy itself through this childish behavior. They want to have a 20 million dollar settlement for a film they only had lunch over. Like I said before, it's blood money. But what I didn't say is that greed never wins. Every film that has been made from ego and greed has flopped. Heaven's Gate, Pluto Nash, Golden Compass, Battlefield Earth Robin Hood, Waterworld. the list goes on. All these films were made from Hollywood ego and greed and it never wins. It never will. The highest grossing film ever Titanic was made by two Studios, Fox and Paramount. Two studio collaboration. They bet on each other to win and everyone succeeded. So why can't Fox and Warner learn from this success? EGO!

The whole top ten list is made from creativity. ET, Passion of the Christ (#12 actually) Star Wars, Shrek 2, Spider Man, these films stemmed from love of the project. This film Watchmen is already suffering from greed. How do we know for sure? Well otherwise there would be no debate. Things would have been done correctly. There are thousands of very intelligent lawyers in Hollywood. I highly doubt someone missed this fine print. It's impossible for anyone to miss it. That means a lot of people knew before and after the film was made and the studios still went ahead with blood sucking each other.

Well basically Watchmen is doomed for failure. I could be totally wrong, but from what I know about greed, this project does not look good. It does not look like an inspired project or a fun project to watch. In fact I think Warner knows that it will be a flop and undo all the money that The Dark Knight made for them. Fox may know this and they may be doing this to mess with Warner's bottom line. Warner just had the best summer of their lives, Fox may very well want to screw that up. I believe that. I hope that this project reminds everyone that greed always fails. We can only pray it sinks in. Until tomorrow, let's talk film.

The Kevin Costner Syndrome

In Power Trip recovery...

Ok, let's talk film. Let's talk about what I call the Kevin Costner syndrome. There is a new trailer for Fast and Furious. It is the forth film as you know in the The Fast and The Furious saga. Do we call it saga? Is it a continuation of anything? No...Well Vin Diesel does not like sequels. I am sure he likes sequels now. He actually is one of these actors who has successfully avoided success by not listening to his audience. He thought he could do whatever he wanted after The Fast and the Furious and XXX. Well, he did and he failed. Why did he fail? Because he turned his back on his audience. Kevin Costner started this trend after he won the Oscar, then micromanaged Robin Rood and Water world to their critical and then evitable box office death

It is crazy that you don't have to be an exec to act like an exec. Actors do it too. They think that power is greater than talent. And that will never be true. You see it all the time. It's really easy to confuse the two. The funny thing is about this syndrome, which you can call Suzanne Sommers syndrome, David Caruso syndrome. Its rampant in Hollywood. It is so easy to get get caught up in the money and the fame. I mean if you're a star, you have everyone telling you how great you are. Money is no object, you can throw it away and get more. Girls or guys are not a problem anymore. A star can lose focus easily.

That's what Vin did. Did you know he is a screenwriter? He is! His second film that he wrote and directed was admitted into Sundance before he was popular. As you know, that is no small feat. I mean Sundance! So, what made this talented, action star, who is smart, turn his back to his audience? Well, he thought he knew it all. What has this later half of this decade taught everyone? It's all about the trilogy.

He made his own cage once

I mean Hollywood should have paid attention when the Scream series made the episodic trilogy popular again. But, sadly they had to learn the hard way when Lord of the Rings slammed dunked the saga trilogy. By then, the damage was done. In the early 2000, sequels to Meet the Parents, the Fast and Furious, Oceans Eleven, XXX, and such all were simply stand alone sequels that did not continue the original story. Those sequels did a terrible job or just trying to recreate the original.

So, Vin should have realized that he was sitting on solid gold from day one. He had two films that he could have taken into Trilogy-ville, F and F and XXX. But sadly he chose not to chase success. He felt that sequels were just a passing fad. Well, the point to all this is that when an actor goes into the Kevin Costner syndrome, they always snap out of it. They realize that they needed to stick with what made them popular to begin with.

Well before some actors totally hit bottom, they beg to be taken back. Sometimes they get a second chance. Look at Costner, he paid some of his own money to get Swing Vote to the screen just so he can play his Bull Durham character style. That's what makes him famous. He plays the down to earth guy. He does it well! So what the hell was he doing in Waterworld and the Postman? Well Swing Vote is ten years to late.



Fast and Furious is very late too. But I write all of this today because when you see the trailer it looks good. It looks fun. It looks like what we should have seen before. The original cast making a good episodic sequel. Continuing the story. I am not saying this film is going to be good. Who knows? But it is good to see every one coming together and having what looks like a good time. That's what this is all about. It reminds me that movies are supposed to be fun and creative, not over produced power trips. Until Tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Oooooo Factor...

Nolan knows best...

Ok, let's talk film. So, I don't think this is anything to worry about or anything at all for that matter. Oh yeah, first things first. Mike who writes the Pixar Blog corrected my misrepresentation of his blog, The Pixar Blog. I said it is the Official Pixar Blog, it is not. It is no affiliation to Pixar or Disney. My apologies. It is a very good and informative blog. I read it, so should you. Thanks Mike. Moving on, here is an article by Telegraph.co.uk that says Cher is Nolan's first choice to play Catwoman. This is hilarious. Yes, please laugh. Where do some of these people get their news.

I am sure this is just a fluff piece. The article also says that Johnny Depp is already cast to play The Riddler. It says the film is to be titled, the Caped Crusader. This is fluff. It is campaigning, again. I talked about this two weeks ago. Everyone is campaigning to be in the third film. I think the execs want to go this route with Johnny Depp as the Riddler and such. This article is nothing more than to get Nolan thinking about casting choices, aka campaigning.

Well the third film will not be like the 90's Batman. Can it? Does it now have the potential to become like a Batman Forver? Or a Spider Man 3? Yes it does. I think Nolan for one is actually being smart. Sure you have you execs that want immediate gratification power. There is the temptation to start spreading around the rumor, "Johnny Depp as the Riddler? Oooooo. Wow" This film is perfect to start the Ooooooh Buzz. I don't think were gonna have the Oooooo factor. Its not gonna be Phillip Seymour Hoffman as The Penguin, Depp as the Riddler and Jolie as Catwoman! Ooooooo.

This is not what Nolan's series is about. The above cast is what most of Hollywood wants. They want to watch everyone go Oooooo. That is why Execs do some projects. So that their friends will go Oooooo. Like the Rocky Horror remake and the Poltergeist remake. I guarantee you there is no real integrity in those mentioned remakes. They are there for the Oooooo factor. That's it. And Nolan knows that he can succumb to the Ooooo factor, but he won't. He is smarter than that. He knows the casting must be accurate to a crime story. Or as a fugitive type of piece and not a fluff, Oooooo factor piece.

Warner now is planning its huge event summer. They want the final Harry Potter and the Third Batman to be in the same year or six months of each other. They are manically wringing their hands together for the biggest summer of their lives. That is the real story. Right now execs are buying their RV's and Aspen Timeshares. It's all financial right now. That's the real Ooooooo factor. They are planning the biggest Warner Summer ever! Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 and The Dark Knight Returns. That is the only thing that matters right now to Execs is that Billion Dollar year. Its all they can think of.

We as an audience care about the movie. The execs are projecting their numbers not even caring about the film itself. This is who they are. They do not and will not ever care about the film itself. They care about the financial results and not the quality results. I don't think they know how! So yes that summer will be great. The casting of The Dark Knight Returns will not Ooooooh us or wow us. It will be the opposite. It will be on the side of unsettling like Leger's performance. That is what The Dark Knight is about. It is not about Warner. Not about actors, It's about a gritty, realistic film for an audience. Quite the opposite of what execs believe. Until Tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Friday Night Rave

Put up or shut up...

Ok, let's talk film. Welcome to the rave. I have now obtained a real full time job, so my posts will be posted late. I am trying to get into a habit to post the night before, but I like my Hollywood news fresh, so we will See how that works. Well, let's shut the brain off and let's just write for the sake of writing! I got my first comment yesterday! I was pretty excited. Fridays would be the day I respond to comments so let's do that for my first one. Anonymous said that he or she likes the National Lampoon direct to video series. First off, thank you for your comment. It was well written and articulate. This user, I hope you mind I call you USER. You didn't leave a name. But this USER says that they don't mind the Direct to Video market already working (on a small scale) and the new market Paramount is establishing with Paramount Famous. This is from yesterdays blog, "Paramount's Panhandling.

Well yesterday I was sticking to the facts and I didn't share my emotion on the actual films themselves. I have never seen them so I can't be critical on the films themselves. I did actually buy American Pie Presents Band Camp. Yes I did. It was trite, but good for parties. Now I am not gonna bag on the films themselves. Just because it is not totally my humor. It obvoiusy doesn't mean it sucks. That's why I don't do reviews, cause every one's taste is different. I mean I think my taste is correct, but unless you're dating me, you don't have to worry about me shoving that into your brain.

Was I was getting to is that Paramount Famous was created to fill in for Paramount Vantage. Vantage was doing small artsy films, like No Country for Old Men, Babel. And now since they went into production and marketing overload, they had to lay off a bunch of people. So now they still have the "make for less money and get decent return" void to fill. So they filled it with direct to video comedies and stopped artsy films. That irked me. I hope I made that clear. If anyone still disagrees with my thoughts please sound off. I have a very dominant type personality, but that doesn't mean I am never wrong, it just means I am always right! Anyway I am glad I inspired good dialogue.

Let's continue with the brainless rave. I saw a few films on DVD this week. I have Netflix and Blockbuster. I saw Apocalypse Now twice this week. That's just how I roll. If you're gonna aspire to or you are a director, please watch that film. It is a masterpiece of direction. You wonder what happened to Coppola when you watch this film. It is soo amazing. I was blown away to see a amazing performance by a 14 year old Larry Fishbourne. So classic. His face was still the same.

Oh yeah, huge point here. I saw Street Kings with Keanu. WOAH! I know. And aside from him trying to still get this acting thing down. I mean he has come a very long way. I like him. But two things about this film. It's a corrupt police drama that is just ok. In the corrupt police drama, there have been masters of the genre. It's like when I was talking about 21 a couple weeks ago. If you're gonna do a genre film, like a mob film, a Vegas scam film, or a corrupt police film. You have to re-set the bar or get out of the game.

Street Kings was not bad. It just was not like it's masters, LA Confidential and The Departed. My God! Those films were so wonderful and amazing and saucy and juicy. I mean what a moment when Guy Pierce and a then unknown Russel Crowe team up after the 2 hour mark in LA Confidential to play the good cop/bad cop. How amazing and shocking was it when DiCaprio was gunned down without warning in The Departed! These were masterful moments in film. In Street Kings, there is no risk. There is no passion like the masterpieces of the genre. The film was not bad, it was just nothing compared to what we have seen in the genre. Why do you think there have been no mob films?

AND the dialogue keeps saying the Keanu is a Bruce Willis type. It is hilarious. Anyway I will stop there. Rent it. Have a good weekend! Until Monday Let's talk film!

Paramount's Panhandling

Paramount's turn...They do this to themselves, I didn't plan this at all!

Ok, let's talk film. So Hollywood now is all about the bottom line. I mean it's always been about the bottom line, but at least it was all about the usual formula. Great pitch + Big star + Big name or cheap visual director = big opening weekend. That's the standard formula. Well, now things are shifting again. I mean this is the week that Hollywood has stepped in it. I mean I have never seen this much greed and reality TV style backstabbing since the closed projection room, coke sniffing days of the 80's. Jerry Bruckheimer and Don Simpson laid the ground rules for stabbing in the back in that time. Well, now it's the years post millennium and no one has grown up. Lack of maturity is to be expected when millions of dollars are thrown around.

That's the real danger here to worry about, isn't it? I mean some people out there literally kill for a lot of money and here you have a business that throws around millions for breakfast. I am not inferring that actual crime is involved, but morality in Hollywood is very corrupt. I have proven that this week. Thought, It is a dangerous thing. It really is. It's cut throat and no one really survives in Hollywood unless you get lucky being involved in a large project. That is what this all comes down to. The people playing in Hollywood want to stay playing forever. The reality is that Film, though a popular medium, will always be a true home for the talented ones. But, money talks. And in Hollywood, money or the ones behind the money, have no talent. The really talented ones, are not the rich ones.

The rich people do not have talent. They never will. I don't know why. Well, maybe I do know. I think it has to do with the fact that you have to really lived life to replicate it properly. And if you have struggled in life and felt real pain, with out having the luxury of 2000 shopping trips like Britney can do, you have something to write about.

Hollywood will always be a losing power struggle between the untalented, rich people and the talented not so rich people. Well Louis Feola, let's talk about this guy. He is one of those execs. Oh yeah and if you are reading this and think I am unfair when taling about execs, read the Offical Pixar Blog. They bag on Eisner for a few paragraphs. I am not the only one who is aware of the destruction of Hollywood Execs.. So, Feola has taken over a NEW branch of Paramount now that it's Vantage is practically non existent. This new Branch is called Paramount Famous. They are taking smaller films such as Road Trip and Without a Paddle and making direct to video sequels.

If Execs could be as honest...

This is of course an immediate response to the Lost Boys sequel that is doing well AND the National Lampoon films out there, most of them you never heard of. National Lampoon and oh yeah American Pie Presents have been doing cheap direct to video sequels to make the bottom line. Well two things about this. Maybe more. You know how I lose count. One, it's a small line to cross, so you would think "why Bother?" I mean 3 million to make and maybe they only double that. Sure the studios that do this don't lose money, but its playing the slots and not sitting at the tables. Its so miniscule, it seems shameful. Why? Because Hollywood doesn't bet on talent. They are giving us empty IDEAS again. It's the Mini HIGH CONCEPT version ideas of the 80's. Remember when everything in the 80's was HIGH CONCEPT. We have Back to the Future to thank for that trend.

Now, Paramount wants to jump in and say, hey you like Road Trip? Here is a ridiculous sequel for you to dismiss. You know what this is, it is oh She is MARRIED? Here is her younger, unkempt sister. This is all it is. It's pathetic. It's Hollywood's equivalent of pan handling. Because all they are going to make is chump change anyway. I am not going to lie to you. I have shook Frank Sinatra's hand. No I really have. No joke. In Vegas when I was 18. So I can't lie or rat on my friends. So I am serious when I say that this is Paramount sitting on the side of the road with a sign that says, Like Road Trip? Give a dollar or twenty! Because no direct to video sequel is ever Lightning in a bottle. It never will be. Otherwise it would not be direct to video.

What they also can be doing here to is hoping for LIB. If Road Trip 2 is suddenly the next Animal House, then they can get a wide release and soak up all the glory for making a high grossing film on a toothpick budget. That actually may be the goal here. With these knuckle heads its hard to tell. Well however you put it, it is a bad idea. How do I know? Well here is TWO. Disney tried this a while ago. They released sequels to Lion King and Beauty and the Beast on direct to DVD. It works for the short term. These films don't have any longevity. Years from now the kids who watched Belle's Christmas or whatever will remember Beauty and the Beast and not the aforementioned. That's the way it is. It's a short term fix. You like Lion King? Here is quick fix that cost us ten bucks to make.

American Pie Presents and National Lampoon series gets old fast. I mean what do you remember? Band camp or American Pie one? Vacation with Chevy Chase or Bag Boy? It's not art, it's..I don't know what it is. It's sad. Its panhandling and it's pathetic. It is extra pathetic too because this branch was created as an answer to Paramount Vantage's fall. SO basically so more Cohen Bros films or Paul Thomas Anderson films. Paramount has stopped giving us great film and now is giving is Without a Paddle 2: Direct to Video. Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

All I Got From My Dissapointment Was A Friggin' Apology Letter..

Now there's a Batman release date...

Ok, let's talk film. Here is the actual apology letter written by Alan Horn CEO extrordinare at Warner.

Many of you have written to me to express your disappointment in our moving Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince to Summer 2009.

Please be assured that we share your love for Harry Potter and would certainly never do anything to hurt any of the films. Over the past 10 years, we have nurtured and protected each film, and the integrity of the books upon which they are based, to the best of our ability.

The decision to move Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince was not taken lightly, and was never intended to upset our Harry Potter fans. We know you have built this series into what it is, and we thank you for your ongoing enthusiasm and support.

If I may offer a silver lining: there would have been a two-year gap between Half-Blood Prince and the much-anticipated first part of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, which opens in November 2010.

So although we have to wait a little longer for Half-Blood Prince, the wait from that film until Deathly Hallows will be less than 18 months. I am sorry to have disappointed you now, but if you hold on a little longer, I believe it will be worth the wait.
Alan Horn
President, Chief Operating Officer
Warner Bros.

Here is really what he should have said.

I keep reading all your blogs and my neice has expressed her rage in our moving Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince to Summer 2009. In fact there is not a soul on this planet that has agreed with this decision

Please be assured that we share your love for cash cows as Harry Potter. Hell it could be French Documetries you guys like. We don't care and we will roll them out if you demand it! We would certainly never do anything to hurt any of the films except as you know not hiring back Alfonso Cuaron because we felt he was too "artsy". Over the past 10 years, we have tried to rush each film before these kids get too old and the kept the integrity of the books upon which they are very very very very very very very loosely based, to the best of our ability. (which without Spielberg directing, isn't much)

The decision to move Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince was not taken lightly over sushi lunch, (I put too much wasabi into my soy sauce at one point) Boy that was rough for me. We never intended to upset our Harry Potter fans. We know you have kept buying tickets, and we thank you for your ongoing enthusiasm and financial support. You can be excited as you want for the films, but if you don't buy tickets, we don't make movies.

If I may offer a silver lining: We are taking The Dark Knight's release date in order to offer us a better chance to break the 400 million dollar mark. That's what it really comes down to. Oh yeah and there would have been a two-year gap between Half-Blood Prince and the much-anticipated first part of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, which opens in November 2010. Well we all know that this series is so easy to forget. We are so totally doing you a favor.

So really we just want to wear the Bat suit next summer. I mean come on The Dark Knight is on fire! Who doesn't want a peice of that?! So that is what it really all comes down to. If I can break 400 million, I can stay working in Hollwood for a long time.
Alan Horn
President, Chief Operating Officer
Warner Bros.

Until Tomorrow, Let's talk film.

The Fantastic Fox

Fox's turn today...

Ok, let's talk film. And some of you still say that Execs have a heart of gold buried somewhere deep in their black chest. I think not. Now I do like to talk of the craft of film and I do that sometimes. In fact I think I do that a lot. I Talk about actual film often. But, one of my joys in life is attacking Hollywood executives They are no talent blood suckers who stifle creativity. They rework director's talent to keep all film on a happy keel so that it appeals to a "broad audience". In other words, we don't want to get real with film because someone somewhere might raise their eyebrows. I mean someone somewhere may not like it if John Cusack didn't end up with Kate Beckinsale at the end of Serendipity. Because that's how the film should have ended.

And just when I think execs can't get any scummier, they prove me wrong the next day. Here is the last atrocity that Fox has done. I will sum it up quickly. Read the article if you want to know the legality. Fox acquired rights to Watchmen in 91. They decided not to do it, too expensive or whatever. My friend at Fox Angie Averitt wasn't doing the marketing then, so they said forget it. They opted to "quitclaim" the rights. Meaning I believe, they don't want to do the film, but if someone else does make it, they have to repay development costs (all those sushi lunches)and give Fox Royalties. In order to remain in compliance with this, the new owner would have to pay up front sans the royalties of course to FOX.

Well Warner Bros didn't pay enough or at all and Fox never said a word to remind them. This is low. This is the lowest I have ever seen execs work. It is mean and totally unethical to wait until Warner has the film completed until they exercised their claim. Well in the eyes of an exec, its not. They obviously waited to see if the film was good or not. Then they claimed their rights. I doubt if the film was bad, they would care. This is exactly what happened. Warner settled but Fox lawyers who originally held the contract, held something back. I am not a legal person, but you don't have to be to smell this manure. Fox waited. They waited until the film was done then said, "oh that's mine, by the way" How childish! This move by Fox execs is appalling. I mean come on, say something before the filming. WTF? Fox can't even act like a responsible adult.

They did not want to make Watchmen, they were sitting on it for 16 years. And now, yes ALL OF A SUDDEN, they want to pee a circle around it. Well I think we all get the idea here. So what is going to happen? Well Fox is going to get major royalties or they will settle for a lump sum which the latter seems ridiculous. They are trying to delay the release of Watchmen, slated for March 2009. I want to say this again and close with this. This is because Warner has made a good film out of it. Warner Bros makes good comic book films. Superman and Batman anyone. FOx has the problem, Fantastic Four and X Men? Not SO good.

So Fox sits back and lets Warner make Watchmen waiting for something to go wrong or go right. Fox does not want to stop it from being made because where is the fun in that? They had a sneaky feeling that is would be good. If they said something before filming, then the film may never get made. But if you wait until the film is finished, then you get the best of both worlds. This is mayhem. This is the devil rubbing his palms together and laughing. Its maniacal.

I would really like to say this surprises me, but again it doesn't. Its hungry, needy no talent execs making money. Blood money. No talent to fall back on. Petty back stabbing to rely on. It honestly makes me sick this time. We pay our 10.50 or so to see film made by people who act like children. Mean children. I would like to see Fox eat crow here. I really would. This is the lowest I have ever seen execs go. Sorry Angie that you have to work with snakes. You have talent. Until Tomorrow, let's talk film!

Warner Bros and the Half-Brained Decision

Logo in the clouds and head way in the clouds...

Ok, let's talk film. Huge news today in Hollywood. Huge, lifestyle changing news. From Warner Bros. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince has now been moved to summer. Whoa! I know. That was a Keanu Reeves WHOA! It was slated to be released November 21st, the coveted spot before Thanksgiving. That's a Golden Spot! You think that would be enough. But no. What have I been saying this whole summer? No, The other thing! That's right my educated film fans! Everyone wants to be The Dark Knight. Harry Potter 6 is moved now to July 17th 2009, the same date basically as The Dark Knight this year. These Warner Execs are so out of touch, they think the release date itself is charmed. How hilarious is that?

The Dark Knight, and I am really getting tired of saying this, is a great film. That is why it is making gazillions! If it was a good film or a really good film, it would not make a gazillion. Indiana Jones 4 is not a great film, it wasn't even a really good film, it was just a good film. Iron Man is a really good film. Dark Knight is a great film. If Harry Potter is a good film or a really good film, it still will not make the numbers The Dark Knight did. It needs to be a Great film. And let us not forget that interest in The Dark Knight was propelled because of the very premature death of a very young and gifted actor.

I am going to say this again. Deep down inside the black heart of Warner Execs, they wish they could have the death of one of the actors to help film sales. If you are naive and say, "No, Jeff, that's unthinkable. Execs don't want that!" Well they do. I guarantee it. If, and please God Forbid, something tragic like that did happen, they would have to act mournful. However, again if one of those young and talented actors met a unthinkable (to us) demise, execs would party at the Mansion. I am telling you 100% that is true. They are proving my theory as we speak. They made a more realistic and darker trailer, check. They did a re-edit to tighten it up two months ago, check and now, they moved their date to where the Dark Knight is now! They are dying to be the new Dark Knight. They are not the only ones. All of Hollywood has Dark Knight fever. It's all about the dark realism tent pole. Don't let anyone fool you. So don't think for a minute that deep down inside execs don't wish for a tragic death to propel this film. Think of all the money they will make.

Why do I harp on this? Well because I want you to know how shallow and heartless these people are. I want you to know that the people that run Hollywood, don't care about the audience, more less, than about the film makers themselves. All they care about is the bottom line. Why? Because they have no talent to fall back on like we do.

I also think that Warner Bros wanted to rework the film even more to make it realistic. It's a dual opportunity here. They get to wear the bat suit next summer and they get more time to work on the film. Another actually pretty good reason to do this is to build momentum for the last films. If you release it Dec, the DVD comes out summer 09 and you still have a whole year before the final two films (summer 2010 and 2011). This way you release it summer 09, DVD in November 09, the first of the final films now only six months away (summer 2010). That way you can really build it up and not lose any momentum of interest.

Well however way you cut it, its a bad idea. They are doing exactly what Walden media did with Prince Caspian, they are moving it from a sure thing to a place where they have no business being. Christmas is perfect for a Harry Potter. It was made for that time slot. It a family film. Families go see it. And now they are removing the family element and making something it is not. Its a tragic move. Forcing it to summer will be and mark my words, a big mistake. The funny thing about Hollywood is that they learn from other's success, but they don't learn from other's failure. Warner is making a huge mistake that will cost them millions. They will make the bottom line, but they will miss the family film Holiday experience. It will make slightly less than what they could have made if they just stayed true to themselves and not chased the Batman. Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Friday Night Rave

Turn off the brain and just write. Write because you LOVE it!

Ok, let's talk film. Friday night rave is here. I know you're all excited. One day of the week I allow myself to be more incoherent than usual, let's do this! Trite and ordinary movie dialogue. Corny film dialogue is all over the place. I see a lot of Independent film on the web. A lot of budding film makers making film and using scripts that would serve better as fire wood. Not that I haven't written great stuff all the time, I have written garbage a lot. I actually most of the time I write crap. If you're reading this blog you can shake your head yes with confidence in that statement. But if I were making a film, you better believe I would try at best to have some meaty dialogue. I think all of us as writers want to get stuck with the "Hello, how are you" We want our characters to be revealed in everyday speech. When in fact and please write this down, we want to see exposition and plot/narrative in tandem.

What does that mean? I am glad you asked. Well put your character in the plot immediately and have your first lines of dialogue stem from that moment, your character's response. It's way more interesting that, "Hello, pass the papaya". It is more fun to learn of characters in the moment. Let's take Die Hard for a moment to analyze. You remember the whole opening scene with John Mclaine in the limo talking to Argyle divulging his life story. I bet if you cut that whole scene and gone straight to the terrorist and have the narrative exposed as the plot unfolded, it would have been surprising and more interesting. Not that Die Hard is in anyway a bad film, it is one of my favorites, but imagine the first half hour cut out and the film tightened. I know you're saying that I sound like a studio exec now. No, I am sounding like I thought of a good way to add an element of mystery to a film while getting the ball rolling.

Why? I am glad you asked again. Because not every film can make up for its lack of interesting dialogue. Die Hard can. If you watch Speed, you wish Keanu Reeves would stop talking right away. Anyway, write dialogue that goes with the Narrative. The narrative is variable, plot is the constant. We have to go to the store, but how we get there is Narrative. Don't spend a half hour changing the oil, spend your time accidentally running over your neighbors caton the way to the store. The neighbor whom you owe money to. Something like that. We will learn more from that.

Beauty and brains..and Beauty.

Everyone wants to be the villain in the next Batman film. I mean everyone. Everyone is campaigning for this. Last week we heard Angelina Jolie was campaigning for Catwoman. Not a surprise. This week Brain Austin Green is campaigning for the riddler. Who knows. I think the only best thing Green has gotten into is Meghan Fox. Who cares really. Here's the thing with this. In the 90's it was an honor to to play the Batman, now, in the Mellenia it is an honor to play the Batman Villain.

So everyone wants to be the villain. Let Nolan decide. When he chose Heath no one had faith in that decision. So let him decide. A film should be the vision of a singular person, not a focus group and certainly not Angelina Jolie. We need Laura Linney to get in there an do it. Ah it's the Rave I can say what I want. Go see Tropic Thunder, you'll laugh till you pee. Until Monday! Let's talk film

Choose The Primeval Path as a Director, Please

Execs want to juice up, hit a home run every time with little emotion as possible. Bonds is a perfect poster child for Hollywood execs...

Ok, let's talk film. So, where do we go from here. It is really discouraging to look at the greenlight schedule. Well I guess its not surprising. Well, look, I mean, the constant battle in Hollywood is talented people trying to do what they want to do while execs change everything so it sells to the broadest audience available. They made it generally friendly and "everybody wins". Green Lantern greenlight today, no that wasn't me trying to be clever, that is the new greenlight major entity as of today. But that's all were going to see. If you were reading this trite diatribe all week, you will know that everyone is swinging for the bleachers because of the Dark Knight's business. Well let's just take a break today and look at a couple films that know the art form.

Because I hope some of you who read this are budding filmmakers who understand the an important rule of being a good director which is knowing how to act or know good acting. All of the best directors out there are actors or they know how to direct actors. I say this because the new crop of directors who are getting hired are not savvy in how to properly direct actors. They are strictly visual directors who bring visual force to the screen and ignore every other quality. They are out there already, Mickey Bay for one, Brett Ratner, two, the list goes on.

I was watching Before The Devil Knows Your Dead on Blu Ray today and I was reminded once again how important the direction of actors is to a film. This film is Directed by Sidney Limet, who helmed, Dog Day Afternoon, Network and The Verdict, that list goes on. He helped a couple actors get Oscars. I think of James Mangold when I think of that quality. This film in particular is a total sensation to watch for the performances. It's one thing to watch actors have great solo performances in a separate film or for a couple of A listers to star together and have a good time, but this piece with Marisa Tomei, Phil Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, Albert Finney, Rosemary Harris...It's like a well oiled acting machine. Every performer feeds off the other. They rely on the other to breathe a certain way. It is breathtaking to watch. I have not or I don't remember being captivated by an ensemble since American Beauty.

Dude, see this now...

"Devil" may have been over looked because it is a borderline melodrama and every actor and the director in it already have like ten noms and Oscars each, but it is still an amazing piece of work. I am not going to review this film. I don't like doing reviews. Millions of people do them. If you know me or read my blog, all I have to say is SEE IT and you know it's approved by me. I never recommend bad film. That just isn't me. But SEE IT.

The thing I do want to stress about this film and I want to point out for all you savvy players is that the Director knows how to work with actors. It is refreshing to see. The new directors on the lots, don't have the patience to do so. And this is what Actors know and hate about film. Film does not challenge an actor. They go do theatre a lot. Marisa Tomei, Larry Fishbourne, Matthew Broderick...All these actors and more, many more go to the theater to get cast because they know they will be challenged.

Making film is a recess for actors and anyone with talent for that matter. For execs and producers is a matter of life and death, sink of swim. All of the talented people know this difference and are not scared by it, because they are talented. Film is a way station for Execs and Producers to make money off of us. Its a dazzle medium. We can't complain about it. We want quality, but all of us who want to demand more, have more important things to do in our lives. So we as an audience are stuck watching grown ups play with millions of dollars. Well if you my savvy Hollywood player get to go to the big leagues, give up something good. Know how to work with actors. I will never be a Hollywood Director. I don't have the means or the opportunity and I am way past my prime. But, you are not! You are young and spry and full of opportunity.

Remember to be primeval when directing film. Mayy directors want to be Avant Guarde and direct in a hip way, I say NAYE. Look into theater directing first and how to work with actors. Know the stage before you venture out into film. Basically know how to direct actors. They sell the emotions of the film. Otherwise you'll be stuck with Natalie Portman acting without barely moving her lips. Ever notice she does that? Well direct primeval. Direct from the gut. That's the only way to be great. Of else you'll be like Brett Ratner. And no one wants more of him. Until Tomorrow, let's talk film!

Same Mashoogana, Different Day

Conan Begins and The Dark Barbarian...Is it just me or...

Ok, let's talk film. Well yesterday to recap a little. If you're an avid reader of this garbage, you may not need it, but if you're reading because I begged you or something, here is a short recap, every studio wants to be The Dark Knight. The Dark Knight is a very good, gritty, realistic film. It is a comic book film, but it has the feel akin to a crime drama. And The Dark Knight is wildly successful. It is now the third highest grossing film EVER. It's gonna out gross TITANIC. So because of this, the playing field has changed. EVERYONE wants to be The Dark Knight. Is this anything new? No, of course not. Hollywood tries to duplicate everything.

Well the newest idea to bring back a hero that is dark, gritty, and can be played dramatically. Lionsgate's idea is Conan the Barbarian. I know. It's laughable. It really is. It like what will these people come up with next? Doesn't anyone out there have an idea for a good, involving film that is brilliant and ORIGINAL. I am sure there all hundreds of screenplays out there that would make very interesting films. But they will never be made into movies because Hollywood doesn't make ORIGINAL film anymore. Even the studio's specialty divisions are not closing like Fox Searchlight, Paramount Vantage and Warner Classics. New ideas are out the door.

Well I can't say new ideas are dead. Because Actors and Directors still want to be challenged. It's the Studio Execs that don't need to be challenged, they just have to line up the numbers at the end of the year. So in order for a Studio Exec to do that, they have to pick a sure thing. Why? Because no wants to leave Hollywood with their tail between their legs

I am going take this a step further. No executive will ever have a brass set of balls. Number one) they don't know how, they don't have talent, they just have Focus Groups. Number two)They want to play in fantasy land forever. If I were a studio head, I would pick a project of mine that is a true passion. If you do that, if the execs would pick a project of pure passion, then if they fail, it would still be worth it, because they will have failed with something that they believed in. The movie may fail and they may get fired, but at least they did it honorably, with a project that they died for basically.

It's like picking out a romantic partner. If execs had to pick out a life partner according to Hollywood Greenlight rules, the woman or man, would be physically perfect with funny Jewish humor for levity. But everyone knows a person and film should be deeper than that. But execs all over are getting replaced by projects they don't really believe in. And that is just sad. If you are an exec, go down or be successful for a project you would die for. That kind of film is interesting. That is the kind of film we want to see. Projects like Rain Man and Forrest Gump were passion projects that made or broke execs.

Well the sad truth is that there is no integrity in Hollywood anymore, there is only the passion to create another Dark Knight. It's all about the Dark Knight until there is something better. Shouldn't Execs be looking for that something better instead of creating another Dark Knight. The wheel works! Let's reinvent it! Until Tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Hollwood Yard Sale

Look for toasters, kitchen aids, and rights to Art Films!

Ok, let's talk film. Hollywood has hit an all time low. Warner Bros is starting to auction off the films that are ART house and will probably not make a lot of money to lesser known studios like Lionsgate and such. Patrick Goldstein of the LA times once again packs a wallop with his blog. Well I am not here to blog his blog. He already did that. But I am here to discuss it with you. So here we go. Hollywood basically wants to rid itself of all artsy films. They don't want any part of them anymore. I don't really know what started this social trend in Hollywood of Studios having to have a huge hit or bust. But it has become the fad. Now numbers have always been a must for Studio Execs. But, execs went on to make good art film anyway depending on the director and actors. I mean you can look at all the studios and find artsy hits like American Beauty, Juno, Napoleon Dynamite, and such as well as the Powerhouse films as Batman Begins and Star Wars Prequels.

Well there are a lot of things that are different now. Artsy films don't make any money. They don't. Even if you're Juno and you break the 100 mil mark domestically, its still chump change. You still didn't even break the surface. There are too many hands in Hollywood. A hit of any kind in Hollywood means that EVERYONE had a hand in it. From the waiter that waited the power development lunch to the niece of the art director who said use blue instead of red. EVERYONE wants a cut and EVERYONE is involved. Why? Because good work leads to other development deals in Hollywood. In Hollywood it's all about who can stay in the game the longest. The other side of this coin is the critical and box office flop. The film that NO ONE was responsible for. They even once had a name for it, An Alan Smithee film. It wasn't used that often but the idea is there. In a bad film, one that turns bad, no one is responsible.

But responsibility its gotten even dingier these days. Now even a good art film that made 100 mil is Taboo. For some reason, if you're not involved with the new GI JOE or the Next Dark Knight, you're nobody. It's that bad now. So, Warner is selling off all it's art films to lesser companies so that they only churn out MEGA HITS! Why not, they can make their money back right away without an audience, and still close the quarter numbers! Its ingenious. Not really, but if you look closer it is like watching mad scientists at work. Warner can make a film with all their resources and funds, then sell it off because it's not a gazillion dollar maker (and gasp, it's an art film). Perfect plan. They may even strike a deal like this ahead of time. Well then what happens when lightning in a bottle strikes and then EVERYONE wants credit, then it's a nightmare. But if it's a Oscar winner that makes 100 Mil, everyone can wash their hand of it.

Now it is the era of the mega mega blockbuster, the film that is critically and box office successful. The Dark Knight has totally set the standard for this. It is a really great movie and it is making gazillions. The problem is this is all Hollywood wants to do now. They want to point and hit a home run for the bleachers. There are of course two problems with this. One, they don't have the experience of doing the right thing. There has not been one film since ET or the Godfather that has been perfect like the Dark Knight. I mean perfect as in HUGE numbers and critical acclaim. No, not Titanic, it was a dialogue disaster. Sorry James, but the spitting scene? Seriously?

So Hollywood has no idea how to turn out a Gone With the Wind, they don't have the experience to do that. These HUGE films that are ICONS were made by singular visionaries that at the time, Hollywood left alone to do their art. Now is the age of focus groups and years of development where the original idea is ripped apart. So Hollywood wants to do this, but can't. They are not set up for it. The Dark Knight is the singular vision of Christopher Nolan. Warner let him bring it. And he brought it. Things are gonna change, but Hollywood is no where near ready to deliver such a passion. Until Tomorrow, let's talk film.

Always In Tune With Hollywood...

Jews are wonderfully funny. But why?! (Larry and Jerry)

Ok, let's talk film. Patrick Goldstein of the LA Times writes a blog that is much what I say. He must read this little pathetic blog! He must! How is it to explain his thoughts paralleling mine. A stoke of genius could be the answer. I would not put genius above me. Why not? Most often it floats under me. Goldstien is a Jewish name. Now this is a thought that perplexes me. Why do the Jewish people run Hollywood anyway? I mean New York Jewish is the funniest. It drives our sitcoms like Seinfeld, Friends, and yes even SATC. All those writers are Jewish. But what makes them funnier than other writers? I have no idea. I love New York Jewish humor. I could write it all day because I know the style. I know how to write a Seinfeld episode, maybe not like Larry David did, but I can mimic the humor pretty well. So I am not sure what makes the Jewish Humor that funny. Neil Simon and Woody Allen were the fathers of this humor. I dunno why they are funnier and more popular than other religions. I don't have a problem with this at all. I love Jewish people. My best friend growing up was Jewish. I was just bring up a curious point.

Well after all that to do I want to talk about Goldstein's blog in the LA times here. He talks about 20th Century Fox's awful summer. They haven't had a hit since the new Star Wars Prequels, X Men, and Mr and Mrs Smith Summers. He says that studios like to run their businesses like other business. Let's tke a couple quotes here to analyze.

And with good reason. This is the first summer since 1997 that Fox hasn't had a $100-million box-office hit. For 10 straight summers, the Fox assembly line has churned out every kind of hit imaginable, from "X-Men" movies to "Dr. Dolittle" and "Big Momma's House" family comedies to last year's "Simpsons Movie." Even more impressively, in three of the last four summers, the studio had three $100-million-plus hits each year (perhaps its best summer being 2005, when it had "Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith," "The Fantastic Four" and "Mr. and Mrs. Smith," which all topped $150 million in the U.S. alone).

Well Fox is eating crow right now and Paramount for that matter. These two studios are buffoons. They strive for the quick buck with no development. Its like they throw money into nonsense to get a quick response and quick buck. Here is another quote.

But having suffered through years of having their chain yanked by the studio's business affairs department and having seen virtually every creative decision approved by Rothman, top talent learned to avoid Fox like the plague. After making an "X-Man" movie there, Brett Ratner complained that Rothman even had approval of releasing key photo images from the film. Innumerable agents have complained to me that Fox doesn't want filmmakers--it wants no-name traffic cops to direct its movies. Here's the people who directed the studio's 2007 summer films: James Wan, Tom Brady, David Silverman, Len Wiseman, Tim Story and Carlos Fresnadillo. I bet some of them are genuinely nice guys, but there's not a Warren Beatty or Tim Burton in the bunch.

Well what Goldstein doesn't say is that Hollywood doesn't care about big name directors anymore. Look at Sahara of a couple years ago. Paramount got all the funds and good actors together, and then they hire a total novice for a director. Michael Eisners son I think it was. I mean a 100 mil movie budget and they bring in a no name really to direct what could have been an Indiana Jones for Matthew McConaughey. They screwed up. But its the Michael Bay syndrome here. This is what Jerry Bruckheimer has done for years. Bruckheimer found Bay and Simon West and these commercial directors who had a lot of visionary talent and they spent their money on actors thinking that actors can take care of themselves Well, they can't.

I know a lot of actors and they need direction. Ever wonder why all these HUGE name films like Bad Boys, Transformers, Armegeddon, Con Air and Bad Boys 2, were just that. Pieces of glorious excess without a great performance and good stories. Because they do not care about that. Hollywood wants to hire cheap directors and have the Director of Photography and the actors dictate the direction. In short , the directors are there for show. Well we don't like that as an audience and actors hate it because there is not direction for them. No challenge. Actors loved to be challenged. No good director is like the boss being away on Vacation. It's chaos. There is frustration and lack of order.

If you have ever been on a movie set, you will know that without a stern and talented director, there is chaos on the set. It's anarchy. People on a film set stand around until a director tells them what to do and if the director does not know what to do, they there is frustration. That is why these popular directors like James Cameron, Peter Jackson, and Steven Spielberg are so popular and successful. They know how to story board and tell people what they want. Again Frank Capra said that a film should be the work of one man. The vision of only one man. And how more right could you be. One man should have one singular vision and stop at nothing to achieve that. That is passion that is what sells. That is what we want to see. The director should be talented and a true leader telling people how to help create a work of art.

In reality here to add to Mr. Goldstein's very good article is that there is a total lack of passion and artistic drive. I mean since the 70's Hollywood has always been about the numbers, the bottom line, that's nothing new. But now, they are trying to run the studios like Starbucks. Its absurd. Its lunacy. Films are works of art and I really believe that aside from all the trash talk I do about MTV taking over the world, I think we are a very smart audience and we will not let that happen. Even the Miley generation will grow up one day and demand better film. Whether or not Hollywood will comply remains to be see. Would you like a Dark Knight Latte? We need to make next quarters numbers! Drink up! Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

Goodbye, Mr. Bernie Mac.

More terrible news. Please pray for Mr. Mac's family and friends. I am really tired of losing great actors this year. I know this is life, but this year seems really hard on me emotionally. Goodbye, Mr. Mac, I really enjoyed your presence on screen. You were a Hallmark of great comedians and a legend of Black Actors and Comedians.

The Friday Night Rave

Leave your bullshit at the door...

Ok, let's talk film. Welcome once again to the Friday night rave! Let's let the muddled brain flow. Paramount Vantage was disassembled a while ago, well two weeks ago. Here is the article. Please read it. Its about what I have been talking about just about every blog. Its about the specialty divisions in Hollywood. The Paramount Vantage. The Warner Classics, the Fox Searchlights. These companies were created a little while ago to handle the Art films, the ones Hollywood doesn't want to take full responsibility for. The Junos and the There Will Be Bloods. Why? Well because they don't take gazillions to make and they make money when done well. They don't rake in the millions, but Hollywood needs them for Oscar competition.

Hollywood knows that they need to make films that can compete in the Oscars. They know they have Scorsese's, Coen Bros. and Paul Thomas Anderson to employ because they don't want to be left out of the Oscar race. How important is the Oscar race really to Hollywood execs? Not one friggin iota. A Hollywood exec cares about the Oscars NOT. They don't have a need to win an Academy Award. It used to be a prestige thing. It means nothing now. It's all about the numbers. It's all about making 300 mil in three weeks. That is all it is about. Hell, it's not even about Superheros or Romantic Comedies. If war movies or French Documentaries were making 300million right now, that's what we would see. A summer of French Docs! It's not hard to think like these people.

Imagine Hollywood is one big football league. The execs are the quarter backs. But these quarterbacks, these execs, want to throw a touchdown pass every time. That's all they want to do. This article I am referring to, say basically what I just said, or I said what the article says, either way, I have thought of this analogy before also. I think the article uses baseball actually. But the Vantage, Searchlight, and Classics, were made to do just that. They made ONE small film at a time with a very talented director. Well this buffoon at Paramount, this knucklehead, John Lesher, he takes over Paramount Vantage and refuses to stick to the business model of making one film at a time. They were throwing short passes. Not with this knucklehead, he decides to hire a bunch of talented directors and shoot for the touchdowns with each one. In essence, he made too many films, Like There Will Be Blood, A Mighty Heart, N Country For Old Men, Into The Wild, and An Inconvenient Truth. I think anyone with half a brain can weed out that list in a hurry. But this guy buries the company with this decision.

Now I do call him a Knucklehead, cause this guy will never be happy. He has no talent. All he is going to do is make stupid decisions to make quick money. In fact this bozo flew the coop to Paramount Mainstream so that he can "help" focus on Iron Man 2 and GI Joe. Cause that's where the real prestige is nowadays. I will build you one even better, I think this was Paramount's plan all along, yes Vantage was demolished to focus on low budget horror and crass comedy pieces. That's what worked for New Line and Michael Bay. But I think this was their plan the whole time. I think they wanted to kill good films completely so that one day we won't even need the Academy Awards. I think Hollywood is happy having the MTV Movie Awards to glorify Hollywood.

I suspect in ten years that the Academy Awards will cease to exists. The ratings are down anyway. Justin Timberlake is slated to host next year to get ratings up. I think they will one day cease to exist entirely. I think MTV will pick up the slack and dumb down movies for us. Not because we want it, but because it's fast and its easy. That is what the film world is about and has been about. Now, the small companies that once gave us good film are obsolete. It doesn't exist anymore. It's gone. Let's get rid of Hollywood execs and MTV. If we get rid of those two ENTITIES, Hollywood with integrity will survive and flourish.

On with the rave, Lars and the Real Girl was really good. Emily Mortimer is up and coming. Rent that. GO see the Dark Knight for God's sake! I am tired now. I am going to live my boring life. Until Monday, Let's talk film!

The Rom Com Dilemma

They meet and they fall in love...

Ok, let's talk film. If you live in reality which I think most of you do, you will know that there is no such thing as finding the "perfect" Boyfriend or Girlfriend. Relationships between a man and a woman are based on best friendship and physical attraction. I think that is indisputable. I am sure Dr. Phil will agree on that basic concept. YET, Infatuation is concept that drives feature film, such as Romeo and Juliet and West Side Story. Those were just the beginning.

Well in the LA Times review of The Sisterhood of The Traveling Pants 2. And thank God the title stops there, I am sure it could have gone on forever. Well the reviewer here says this

In the current popular culture, female friendships -- at any age -- are generally considered secondary to life's "important" relationships, the romantic bonds between men and women.

Nowhere is this depressing trend more evident than in Hollywood, where story lines putatively about women's friendships tend toward the saccharine ("Mona Lisa Smile"), the malicious ("Mean Girls") or the boy-crazy (take your pick).

Which is why it's such a pleasure (and a relief) to encounter movies such as "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2." Like the first "Pants" movie, it presents its heroines' relationships as complicated, challenging and particularly rewarding, and not simply as a vehicle for finding the perfect boyfriend.

This is obviously painfully true for a lot romantic movies. It's all about finding the perfect girl or guy. Where is the reality in Hollywood regarding real relationships? Don't make me pull the SATC card! I haven't seen it and I probably never will but at least you have to give that film KUDOS for delivering reality in male/female relationships. Well it's Hollywood. So, you have you remember that there is a formula to all of this.

A man meets woman in some sort of High Concept matter. Old writers called it a "meet Cute". If you saw Nancy Meyer's The Holiday, you know that term. Then, there is a problem, maybe and most likely the man or woman has lied or pretended to be something they are not, got into a situation they should not have, and herin the comedy ensues. Then, in the third act, the truth comes out and someone gets hurt. Then they realize that this person is the ONE and they fall in love finally at the dramatic end.

Some are really remarkable

If you saw 27 Dresses this year, I did cause I like James Mardsen, and it was the MOST formulatic Rom Com EVER! It was actually so formulatic, it should have been painted by numbers. My Best Friends Wedding, What Happens in Vegas, and the list goes on. I know! What's the problem. Where are the real films that challenge our way of thinking an living. Films are supposed to do that. Films can and do challenge us, they can save our lives if we let them and if we watch the right ones.

Well I may be babbling now and pleading toward a formula that will never be broken. It would be easy to say that Hollywood makes these films for people with short attention spans. However I do not think so. I give the film fans out there FAR more credit than that. I think Hollywood thinks its safe. Hollywood likes safe. The Rom Com formula is very safe. How do they keep selling the same formula and why does the same formula keep looking semi appealing? I am glad you asked. They just interchange the actors. They try to get chemistry out of thin air.

Do you wanna see real chemistry film fans! Rent Before Sunrise. It has two of the most non mainstream attractive people, Ethan Hawk and Julie Delpy and it WORKS. It is chemistry perfection and it is a very very effective romantic film, because it is real. Hollywood knows that chemistry between two actors is what makes the formula effective. So the next question is, can we have a film that adapts to the chemistry or lack of chemistry between two good actors. If you have seen Frankie and Jonnie, you will know they tailored chemistry around Al Pachino and Michelle Pheiffer, and it worked.

I think, and I have said this before, we as an audience are hungry for real stories and not just the generic formula. I think we want to be emotionally challenged while watching a film. Heck, I know a dozen girls that broke up with their boyfriends after watching Jerry Maquire. So you can't say that film doesn't affect life. It does. And it isn't a shortage of female writers. Last year 2007 we saw the most nominations for female screenwriters: Diablo Cody for Juno, Tamara Jenkins for The Savages, and Nancy Oliver for Lars and the Real Girl, and Sarah Polley for Away From Her. Put that in your blog and smoke it! The talent and demand is out there. What is stopping us? You guessed it, Hollywood studio execs that went for What Happens in Vegas and originally passed on Juno. Execs will always be the thorn in the side of Hollwyood. Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

The Fine Line Between Funny and Offensive

Whatever you do, don't call us "retarded"...

Ok, let's talk film. Now is funny, ironic, strange, true, what have you. Well. the National Congress for Down Syndrome has a point. However, reading between the lines here is worth the while. The new film, Tropic Thunder with Ben Stiller, is already being criticized for its use of the word "retard". Ben Stiller's character is apparently accused of or is Mentally Disabled in the film, which takes place in the 70's before PC was invented. Well PC was uninstilled in the minds of Americans. I am trying to fully understand the problem with this. I know there is a fine line. I know this. There is a very fine line between funny and offensive. But, let's just brainstorm here.

I saw Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay the other night. I laughed very hard. There are a lot of racial jokes in there. Tons. It is wall to wall racial humor. This is how we survive in our society. We are supposed to laugh at ourselves. Well I believe those of us that are healthy do. Some people don't though. Some people go through life miserably. They don't smile at anything.

Offensive humor anyone?

Well, these may be those people or this thought. I think I know what National Congress for Down Syndrome is trying to do. They are trying to make sure that they have a say. I don't think they are really trying to censor anything. I think they are trying to just put their two cents out there. I actually don't even believe that these people really care. They know Hollywood sometimes makes fun of everything and everyone to just sell a ticket. And like is just said, it is healthy for us as a society to laugh at serious things once in a while to keep us sane.

No I am not condoning total degradation. I don't believe in that. But what you have here is Ben Stiller, Jack Black, and Robert Downey Jr. I don't believe any of these actors are or would get into anything malicious. Consider the source. Well here is the secret, I think they do consider the source. I think they are making waves here in an ocean that they know is not deadly. Its much ado about nothing! These are people are just saying "oh yeah, you're making fun of Mentally Disabled Americans! Uh Stop it!" I don't even think they are making fun. Why am I even talking about this in this much detail. I am glad you asked.

Because we are going to run into the grapevine factor with this rumor. This accusation will inflate if it isn't already. I am sure in about a week, some people will not see it because the will think the whole film makes fun of "retards". I'm quite sure that is not true. Ben Stiller raises money for Lou Gehrig's disease, among others. These are actors and filmmakers who are trying to mame us laugh. I don't think they are purposely doing cruel humor, I think they are trying to push the envelope of humor without totally offending. Yes it is a fine line. I remember what my friend Ralf always told me. "An ametur comedian dresses up like an old lady and gets pushed down the stairs, a Professional comedian pushes an old lady down the stairs." There is a lot of truth to that.

Now, this is insulting

Let's take this to another level. If you haven't guessed, I am not offended by racial humor. I am a Mexican American and I do not take Mexican jokes offensively. I like Carlos Mencia. I am not offended by Cheech and Chong. However, I am offended by fart and dick jokes. I get really offended when someone gets kicked in the balls in a film. I am offended when someone gets hit in the head or falls down the stairs. Why? Because it offends my intelligence. I think we as a society should rise against the "whatever" Movie. (begin Patriotic music) You know Date Movie, Superhero Movie, Epic, and such. They might as well have a self parody called Shit Movie. Why not. It could be a farce of a farce. That makes fun of all the very non funny parodies. They are not funny. At all. Not one of these films are funny. And the writers of these films throw together 80 minutes of awful humor (not even the standard 90 minutes for Feature Film) And then they charge 11.50 a ticket. What a waste! That is an insult. These are the films that insult me! And they should insult you! Rise against them! And I honestly hope Ben Stiller goes easy on the Mentally Disabled. Why? Because he is Jwish anyway! AND Because we all had to sit through Cable Guy. That film was retarded enough. Until tomorrow let's talk film!

Hello, My Name is ...And I am a recovering Hollywood Executive..

Hollywood Execs Anonymous...

Ok, let's talk film. Two things are happening in Hollywood now. Well they have been happening, I am just going to lay it out here for you, my savvy Hollywood player who is already aware of this. The first thing that is happening is that the Golden stars of today are rebooting sequels that happened in the 80's. With Rambo, Indiana Jones, Terminator Salvation, and Star Wars, the one that started this trend, we know that to be old news. But this new trend is the one that irks me. If in a trilogy, Like Spider Man or The Mummy specifically, the third installment sucks or is not up to critical par, do a forth one. I am not sure what is propelling this thinking thought. With the Mummy a 4th one is already greenlit and the numbers are not even in. Maybe they are going off the 42 mil opening weekend? Possible, but 43 mil opening does not make a sequel.

Well here is my thought on this. I will try to stay on topic here cause I am going to talk about the Fast and the Furious 4, also. For Hollywood, the first successful tent pole in a franchise is like a drug. Its like the first time a person tries cocaine. I have never tried illegal drugs and I know you haven't either, but I wanna use this scenario because I think it best fits Hollywood exec thinking. The first film in a tent pole is like a dose of cocaine. It's the best it's gonna get. Duplicating that rush is impossible. I think you know you know this analogy pretty well. And that's the thing. Success is addicting with execs. A true statement for anyone, but for execs that is the only addicting thing. They have no real talent besides crunching numbers, so they can't be addicted to performance or writing or directing, they can only be addicted to big opening weekends. I mean imagine that. You have all this money and all this power like Michael Eisner, and you have no talent. None. Its gotta be frustrating.

Wonder Drug

So you have to live through other people. You're an exec and you hear that critics don't like the third installment? You do it again. You make it one more time. Even if the directors or actors who have talent, want to move on, you don't care. You do a forth one. And I have to say this goes for some actors too, even though they may be in it to really honestly play a character again because they loved it, like Harrison Ford or Stallone. Everyone is out to prove something. Everyone now in Hollywood wants to top what they one did half assed. I think it is a noble thing. But its a pissing contest now.

I mean Kevin Costner wants to do Bodyguard 2? Eddie is doing Beverly Hills Cop 4. There is a Spider Man 4 and Fast and Furious 4. There is something to prove here. There is a relapse factor if you will. A need to repeat the first rush. Can it ever really be repeated? No. Can we ever truly get another Raiders of the Lost Ark or Beverly Hills Cop? No. We need a recovery group for greedy talentless Hollywood execs. Until tomorrow, let's talk film!

Recover Morgan and Terminator Needs Real Juvination

I dare you. Go ahead and try to spot him in The Dark Knight...

Ok, let's talk film. Who is Anthony Michael Hall in the Dark Knight? I saw it again for the 4th time last night. I know I skipped Xfiles and Mummy 3 to see the Dark Knight again. And I keep forgetting to look and see who he is. A certain someone could point him out and she knows who she is, but alas with anyone else or my lonesome, I cannot tell. Well I finally looked his character up last night on IMDB and realized that he is the guy who interviews the guy who plays Bruce's Attorney. Well I don't do spoilers, so that's all I can say, but look for him and he looks nothing like his Breakfast Club days. Totally crazy.

Well Arnold Our Governator was shown clips of the new Terminator Movie and he says the following:

"They showed me some footage, but I don't have a feel for the movie. I didn't see enough. I wasn't sure who the Terminator was. I don't know if there is one or if he's the star or the hero. These are the things that determine the success and how the strong the movie will be."

Well, Arnold is very right. He says that they, Terminator Execs, need to define the characters. Arnold says, that he didn't see enough coherent footage. I am going to take the liberty of filling the blanks in Arnold's quote. I know what he is trying to say. He didn't see a story, he saw one) Christian Bale, the savior of rebooting, Second) a darker tone to the film, and Three) bigger robot things around Christian Bale. So what did Arnold see exactly? Well he saw The Dark Knight disguised as a Terminator Movie.

No this is true. Don't make that noise like I am crazy! This is what this is. This is what execs want. They don't care about the story. I know they don't care about the story because they didn't put one together. The probably don't have a cohesive story. All they want to do is sell Christian Bale in a huge franchise. It's nothing less than all spectacle. Is this the right thing? I don't think so. Hollywood execs are notorious for not doing the right thing. The right thing to do in this case is to sell a story. Get us excited about a story. We want to know who is the Hero and who is the Villain. We as a moviegoing audience need to know who to root for and who to boo for! Sure it can be fun to see Christian Bale in a reboot. But he is not the answer. He is not the Jesus Christ of sequels as execs think. We need a good story to root for. We need a smart villian who is as smart as our hero. Until we have that we will never run out to see Terminator Salvation. Never. You may have one big opening weekend. But you'll never own the prize. So until we get a good story. No one will be interested in this film.

Please get well soon!

Morgan Freeman is in serious condition in the hospital. He was in a major car accident, and Thank God is going to make a full recovery. Please pray for his family and Morgan. Please pull through. We need your soft voice for narration! Among other great roles to come! You are one of the best out there. Please recover fast!

Until tomorrow, Let's talk film!